i think i had been wowing so much that im detached to the relatively real world in kelvin's words. well, yes. in 10 days, i am now level 26 on a brand new dranei shaman. woot. not bad for a girl who don't play games but WoW.

bryan's addicted too okay. & his condition is worse than mine. not seeing the sun for 4 consecutive days isn't good news, right? unless you consider the fact that he is now level 43? hahaha. okay this is retarded. blizzard consumes everything ranging from energy to money. things like time, relationship with the non-wow people (ie: family, relatives which i dont have and friends who dont play WoW). & it is also a burdern when you have no job yet have to pay like 25 bucks every month.

i feel that my life is going down the drain. not caused by alcohol, sex nor drugs, but games. and it is bad. i've lost touch in music (i've been kicked out of band, but not because of excessive gaming. more of a place i won't want to be back again). i feel the sense of musicality, the sense of touch is fading away. i still love it, but i dont seem to feel it anymore. (i guess that explains the out of tuness when i played on the violin the other day)

and of course, along the way, i've lost bits & pieces of myself. im not what i am when i entered poly. the strong, fiercely independant yinkwan i used to be. okay i'll remove the word 'fiercely'. i used to believe that i can depend on myself to do most things. friends that i used to call best friends and loves aren't that lovable anymore. eyecandies aren't as sweet anymore, only because i start to appreciate their presence less. ever since i was attached, i hadn't had a good chat with the following people: cally, wangzhi, liyi & idk. i had been busy only to try to make him happy, channeling my time to make sure that he is not sad. which sums up to nothing because the harder i try to more loser i felt and the more difficult it is to make him happy. & when i stopped trying, i think it was getting a little too late to save those times that i talked over the phone or msn with for hours.

because we all live a life in azeroth. the city of the damned.
if someone ever gets me out of there, i'll never go back there again i swear.
but that is if someone ever manage to in the first place.